3;51 am tuesday march 31 2015 fell off the wagon

i felt right to drink tonight....i have had a 40 of steel reserve and a double shot of early times or some other shit bourbon...and started a tall can.....i am getting tired but for some reason i think if i am gonn drink after being sober for eight or so days i should do it up!...but....for what?..to be drunk all by myself?...i am good company but i even get bored of me sometimes...my head is not swimming like it has been...it certainly is not focused.....will this fall from the wagon last long?...i have about 6 tall cans left........i did some painting tonight.....i cnnot say i have much to look forward to....maybe the swans concert....maybe on my birthday someone will fuck me......